On looking stupid in public

I've recently observed a concerning phenomenon.

At first I thought it was some sort of outlier like our pleated khaki short, cell phone holster friend we mentioned a few days ago.

But no. I'm afraid it's much worse than that. Much more common.

And it seems to primarily affect a particular demographic. Middle-aged men.

The offense?

Wearing bone conduction earphones.

For the uninitiated, these are a type of headphones that sit over the bone in front of your ear rather than in your ear. It allows your ear to remain open so you can hear outside sounds.

Now don't get me wrong. These tools have their place... like exercising somewhere where it might be good to hear the sound of an oncoming car. Or maybe when driving.

But you know where they don't have a role?

While in conversation with another human being.

Are you taking phone calls so frequently that you can't be bothered to remove your headphones?

Are your podcasts so important that every second matters. Great... this conversation is over... I can get back to Joe Rogan.

I had a conversation with this cat at church recently. He was wearing them. I assume he was listening to me. I assume he was listening to the sermon.

It will forever be a mystery.

It's rude. And it looks stupid. Like you belong in Star Trek. Cool show, but not somewhere you should take fashion advice.

But look, you do you. If you want to wear Speedos at the community pool, who am I to judge?

I kid you not... I am writing this from a coffee shop this morning. As I sit here, a guy walks in to meet a buddy for coffee. He's wearing these headphones as I type...

So what's my point? Fair question.

Just because you can do something, doesn't mean you should.

The headphones are a tell. A person who can't quite be all the way here. One ear in the conversation, one ear somewhere better. Always half-listening.

Most people run their money the same way.

The market's always murmuring in the other ear, the next thing, the better thing, the thing they're missing.

They're never actually present to what they have or what they're planning on doing with it.

You can live that way. Plenty do. One ear always somewhere else.

But I'd suggest you take the headphones off. You might hear something.

Best,

John Montgomery